The Bachlorette..better late then never!

So, it took me a couple nightmares and brainwashing to get over what I witnessed on Monday night. The countless painful moments that were witnessed of these 25 bachelors (and it is clear why 23/25 are still bachelors) were nonstop...some of my favorite, stand-out, sheer pee your pants laughing, crawl into a corner and cry moments are as follows:

• I first thought Frank from Chicago was cute. He has the dorky, trendy horn rimmed glasses and seems to be a light hearted guy that is following his passion - although, that passion took him back to his parents home to write screen plays..at 30 years old.
• Justin, "Rated-R" the wrestler from Canada..well he certainly is playing the gimp role well, hobbling in with crutches. In the first scene, I was convinced he was missing his big toe..hence the foot cast, but that was wrong.
• I kinda think Craig M...the one with the McDreamy hair, as McDouchey as he is, is a fox.
• Jay, the creepy "lawyer" from Illinois did NOT rub me the right way. His fake courtroom scene in the beginning was him clearly trying to imitate the scenes that he watched in Law & Order, he had a bad back comb hairstyle, a face that looks like its made out of play-doh, and the personality of a plaster wall. Thank GOD he got the boot
• Then, theres Derek, the Shooter. I don't have much to say about this, because he made me so UNCOMF talking about his "shooter" experience that im just happy that he said sayonara
• Kyle, the outdoorsman from Colorado. Were you raised by a pact of grizzlies in the mountains? I think that is clearly the vibe he was giving off, by showing his home filled with taxidermy, a curly-que greasy hairstyle, and the initial introduction to Allie equipped with the bad "reel-her-in" move.
• Hunter and his ukulele.

But, then admist..there was my favorite (please pick up some heavy blogworthy sarcasm) the one that made me laugh more than not - mind you, he did receive a rose..so I am looking forward to more moments and more knee slapping laughs with my favorite, bubble boy himself: KASEY

• For those that forgot about dear old Kasey, the 27 Ad-Exec from Fresno, let me refresh your memory. He speaks like he has a bubble/frog/foam in his throat. When I say that I really struggled, I really struggled to understand what he was mumbling. Now, all he needed to do was take a hard sip of water, or clear his throat. I don't know if this is a sick cry for attention from Allie, or if he is trying to sound like he is broadcasting himself from 10,000 leagues under the sea..he needs to fix this stat, for his sake. But, for my sake - I enjoyed it immensely, got some solid laughs, so thanks Kase!

Moral of the episode:

1. People are so awkward when they are first meeting someone, that is a potential romantic endeavor. The times that the "kinda lean in for a cheek kiss", "hand shake/hug/pull away/back up" "hey, how are ya's"..just really not natural, really uncomfortable, and just down and out ugly.
2. Allie needs to control the volume and excitement factor. She's cute, really just a down to earth girl lookin' for love - but the shouting/screaming, over excited laughter, and mega-watt smile 24/7 was a littttle over the top
3. Allie needs to learn to style extensions. They were looking more like pre-cooked spaghetti noodles then goldilocks
4. I have to say, I am looking forward to this season. It will for sure provide some good laughs, tons of complete UNCOMF moments, and probably make me think that my dating life and some of the suitable bachelors in my world, just ain't too damn bad!